DOCUMENTATION OF A DREAM DELAYED

About KELLEY ROSE

It was Anais Nin who beckoned...

"Throw your dreams into space like a kite and you do not know what it will bring back, a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country."

After a particularly challenging personal season which upended everything I knew to be fact--my marriage of 25 years ended, I was redefining myself in emptynesthood and my beloved dog died -- I did throw my "kite" up....and what it brought back was the same knowing I suspect I've had since age 12 during a visit to see my father and stepmother in their aerie of a Manhattan apartment. It was the tiniest, yet most inviting way of living I had (n)ever imagined and something imprinted in my mind during that visit that would forever spark a sense of curiosity of that which lives just beyond the narrow yellowbrick path I was fastidiously laying. It turned out to be a beautiful path and what's not to love about a golden one? The fact that it ended did not negate these truths. It was laid out of love, out of comfort, out of a desire for "safety", out of service, out of family and tradition, out of familiarity, out of a sense of duty and out of hope. But it ended in a muddy marsh with a personal faceplant and it was obviously time to make some big changes....thus the kite-throwing exercise.

In June of 2016, I relocated from suburban Austin to NYC to a teeny tiny nest in the middle of West Village in an attempt to make a life in the concrete jungle and fly my joyful kite a' la' big city-style. 

Alternately, I wake-up thinking "oh-my-goodness-what-have-I-done" to "oh-thank-you-for-this-amazing-chance." It's the scariest thing I've ever done. It's also the most exhilarating. I don't ask for it to be easy though as I didn't go into this phase for comfort--just growth--and let's just say, IT IS DELIVERING. I am profoundly grateful for this experience.

If you'd like to follow along, I can assure you there will be some observations of floundering, of triumph and perhaps a few cringes. I suspect they'll range from, "bless her little heart" to "thank God that isn't me." 

But just know that I chose this particular adventure for my next season....and I have 1,000 yards of extra-sturdy kite string and I intend to utilize every damn inch. I got this.